Understanding Childhood Trauma
While working as a case manager with high-conflict families, I witnessed firsthand how often children are caught in the crossfire of adult conflicts. Through these experiences, I learned not to blame the adults involved, as many strive to parent better than they were parented themselves. Understanding childhood trauma and its long-term impacts is crucial, mainly when no interventions are implemented. Abuse, separation, neglect, and loss are challenging for adults, but they can also profoundly affect children. When people are hurt, they may unintentionally hurt others, including their children.
The Impact of Childhood Trauma
Childhood trauma can be seen in numerous ways, from experiencing parental conflict to dealing with the loss of a loved one. These experiences can leave lasting scars that affect mental, emotional, and physical health well into adulthood. Research indicates that ACEs can increase the risk of chronic diseases such as cancer, diabetes, heart disease, and even suicide. Children exposed to toxic stress often struggle to form healthy, stable relationships and may have unstable work histories and financial difficulties as adults.
Here are some practical tips for parents to help reduce the impact of ACEs and childhood trauma:
1. Know and Identify Your Feelings
Self-awareness is a powerful tool for parents or caregivers. Understanding your emotions and being in tune with your inner world equips you to guide your child in identifying and labeling their feelings. This process can help children develop emotional intelligence and better cope with their experiences.
2. Create a Safe, Consistent Environment
Safety is a fundamental need. When children are recovering from trauma, they need consistency and an environment where they feel loved and supported. A safe space allows children to express themselves without fear of judgment, fostering open communication and emotional healing.
3. Teach Coping Skills
Equip your children with coping skills such as deep breathing, taking breaks, saying affirmations, practicing mindfulness, and engaging in physical activities. Helping children recognize where certain feelings manifest in their bodies can also be beneficial. For instance, they might learn that when they feel angry, their heart beats faster, or their ears turn red.
4. Support Problem-Solving Skills
Children encounter social problems daily and may not always know how to resolve them. Encourage your child to think through solutions and implement strategies. Provide guided opportunities for them to practice problem-solving skills, which can build their confidence and resilience.
5. Implement Schedules and Predictable Routines
Children thrive on predictability. Establishing daily routines can provide a sense of stability and security, which is particularly important for children recovering from trauma.
